Waldeinsamkeit is what I have been looking for.
According to Dictionary.com it is a combination of two words. I really love this word and what it means.
It helped me answer that stupid midnight question of Who am I?
I am ... as one very wise friend told me: Who do you want to be today?
Today I say: I am ... this ~
and I dance to music in the kitchen with my headphones on while making beef stew.
Tomorrow I say: I am ... this ~
and I open my arms to encompass my tiny farm.
The next day I say: I am ... this ~
and I open up my backpack and pull out my camera.
...
Another day I say: I am ... this ~
a medical advocate or
... making spreadsheets and accounts of all expenses...planning meals... planning
The next day I say: I am...this ~
imagination running wild.
Finally I say: I am...this ~
Waldeinsamkeit.
