Are you as smart as a phone?

I say this with 'tongue in cheek' [I wonder where that saying ever came from?]

Anyway.
I'm not as Smart as my son's Smart Phone.

While in Virginia for his Ultra Marathon, he programmed it so that the phone would 'tell' me via Sprint Navigation how to get to Great Falls to an Aide Station.

Easy right? Sure, if you know your way around a Sprint touch screen thingy phone. My son made it so darned easy looking when he demonstrated it to me before dawn on the day of the race.
I was pretty sure I had it down. All I had to do was touch 'favorites' then my destination.

It worked like a charm getting me to the Aide Station. That is, until the annoying female voice decided that I should be going a quarter of a mile further down the road to the Visitor Center.
*You are off track, re-routing,
make a 'U' turn*

I parked the car and get out.
The annoying lady kept telling me I was 'off track'.
I tried the nifty trick my son had shown me ... of how to 'swipe' her off.
Um.
I think I did something really odd because the phone #'s list came up.
Happily this did shut her up.
Unfortunately, at that moment, there was suddenly no cell service.

Miss Sprint told me one more time as I stuck her in my cargo pocket,
*Make a 'U' Turn...*
Desperate times make for desperate measures.

I asked a young man walking by it he could please turn the GPS woman off.
He obliged quickly [thinking I was a nutcase for sure]...and hurried off.

After meeting my son and seeing him off again, I had to head back to the start line.
I slid the phone open, of course this was going to be a piece of cake.

I touched the Navigation icon. But couldn't remember the proper steps to find the 'favorites'.
I floundered around with it and thought I had it...
The phone display indicated that it was 'searching'...and that I could not be found.

Oh great.
Perhaps if I just started driving.

Which I did because I recalled how to get out of the Park, that was easy...only one way.
About 3 miles into the drive, the Sprint Lady began to give some decent directions.

Oh boy, I was high tech now! Whoo! After all my own little lame Tracfone just had a number pad and according to my son and nephews...it was very archaic.

Miss Annoying started to tell me that I was OH HORRORS!!!...~~
*Off Track, make a 'U' turn*
I knew I was not off track, I knew I was going in the correct direction.

After all, I had pulled over and consulted a paper map and written directions.
I was NOT Off Track.

However, I did successfully make the trip without getting lost back to the Start/Finish Line.
SHE finally shut up in my pocket.

My son was amused when I'd told him about it. I sighed and said, 'I think your damn phone is smarter than I am...and I find the GPS lady very annoying.

Maps.
I really like paper maps. They don't talk, they don't ring with a phone call at an inconvenient time, nor do they tell you to make a 'U' turn.

When I came home tonight I discovered a beautiful new Rand McNally Road map on the kitchen table.
I may not understand how to work the Smart Phone.

But I surely can read a road map.