A bit of Equine Stuff

Busy morning! This time hubby didn't wake me at 4 am! Whoo Hoo!

Our old pony is starting to show his advanced age. This past winter has been hard on him. He gets a stall inside at night as he is the only one who won't try and rip things apart. Throughout the winter he has had access to places where he can not only eat hay, but he could search for greens.

I checked our paperwork and we got him as a 4 yr old from our friends in Missouri. I always thought he was a 2 yr old when we got him. That would put his age at 32. This is the first year that I've seen him lose weight. 

He was a very happy camper all this week when I found patches of green for him to be tethered out on.

He is our weed whacker and trimmer for tough spots.

In all of his years of being tied out, he has never ever damaged a vehicle nor has he ever gotten tangled up. 

This is 15 years ago when I had him tied to the tractor.

He surely has had a good long life being a Guard/Yard Pony. His first job on our place was being a teaser for our mares. His retirement job is Guard Pony and Entertainment Pony.

Here he is ON Guard in 2009. I physically had to get out and move him out of the way.  

He is such a handsome fellow with such a fine temperament. He can prance and dance like a fancy high stepping pony. But considering that he has been handled every day since he arrived here, he is a breeze to lead around.

I love how he talks to me with his wee little whinny every morning and evening. He wants to make sure that I don't forget him.

And since I was going through older shots, I came upon a photo of our old 'string' of riding mules in 2005.

Left to right. Henry, Badger, Pipes, and Patchy. All from our Jack named Bruce. All half brothers.

Rich's main mount was Henry and mine was Badger.

Patchy now works in North Carolina as a pack mule doing training exercises with the military and was used to pack in supplies after last year's hurricane.

The others are no longer with us but always in our hearts. These guys were our 'cool' dudes.

Another quiet rainy, misty, cold yucky day in WI!

Ghosts of Christmas Eve

No matter what, Christmas brings about feelings of both joy and sadness for so many people. When I first met hubby, he said he didn't like Christmas very much. It reminded him of spending Christmas in Vietnam away from his family.

My mom would grouse often about Christmas for something that happened in her young life around that time of year.

Dad. Well, I don't recall Dad ever complaining about Christmas. He seemed to be enthralled with the lights and ideas of gifts for his family. He let mom take care of the shopping and wrapping, but he took so much joy in watching us on Christmas morning. I'm sure mom did too, but she was also in charge of doing all the cooking and prep work.

As a parent I rejoiced in seeing my kids open gifts and the surprise on their faces. 

Back then, when my ex was on duty as a firefighter we celebrated Christmas when he was able to be home. Santa made exceptions for Firefighters, you know.

On many Christmas Eve's when I was home alone with the kids, I'd pick up the phone and sit in front of the Charlie Brown Tree that was so lovingly decorated with paper rings and homemade ornaments along with regular glass balls. I'd call my father in Virginia and have a glass of wine while we chatted. I recall putting the glass up to my eyes to see the tree and lights through the wine and glass. It sparkled with magic.
I'd relate that to Dad and we'd talk about 'stuff'. Not important or life altering stuff, but just stuff. 

Now over 30 years later, I can look back on Christmas Memories and smile at them and feel a bit sad also.

I do miss those conversations with my Dad the most at night while sitting and looking at my Christmas decorations. I often have a pretend conversation with my Dad so he can catch up on all the latest in my life.

So my Dad is my Christmas Ghost. I want to share with him all the fun I have enjoying the lights, the trees, and of course the fun I have making 'scenes' to photograph. [Dad was my inspiration for photography].

We had long discussions on the use of light, focus, and composition.

From Promises to Keep:
Transiberian Orchestra known as TSO:

And so it's good that we remember
Just as soon as we've discovered
That the things we do in life
Will always end up touching others

Tonight, is no different. 

Thanksgiving Thoughts

Over the years we have been so lucky to have the 'kids' visit during Thanksgiving, even though it was the Gun Season for deer.

Hubby generally had one or two deer that he was processing. One would be for his daughter and one for us. My husband's family grew up hunting deer. My mom's family did also. 

This photo is from my Dad's archives of slides that my brother scanned and saved. This would be my cousin standing in his yard after he and his brothers, father, and uncle had a successful hunt. I think the photo would have been taken in the mid 1960's.

Hunting and family get togethers was more of our family tradition for a long time. 

I have unscanned photos from many years ago with my young boys watching their grandmother process a deer. 

Anyway. Our country families were always brought together by the hunting aspect of Thanksgiving week.

That has stopped. The big draw was my Mother in Law, she'd always put out a big meal. She was one of those people that could make magic in a kitchen without seeming to make any effort at all.

When she moved to her apartment and started to decline in health, I'd make lasagna and take it to her place. The rest of the family sort of wandered away and did their own thing.

Geography played a big part in our get togethers.

Distance does that. Sometimes travel is fun and sometimes it is just too hard on those who would like to travel but because of health reasons, cannot.

I will remember past Thanksgivings fondly even with all the extra stress that was involved.

I recall the long road trips to my Grandparent's home and the fun we had with our cousins. All we have left are photos and distant memories now.

Here are a few photos of Thanksgiving pasts...when some of the grandkids were still wee ones.

They are grown up now and doing their own things...

Time moves on. Where did it all go?

Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Ornaments~

So Shirley from Ride a Good Horse challenged those who read her blog to talk about unique ornaments.

Sounds like fun. 

I have a few very unique ornaments that some may not even consider to be a typical ornament. 

Nine years ago a little girl who used to be my 'upstairs' neighbor came to go for a walk in the woods with Morris and I just before Christmas. She was 9. She handed me a gift she had made. It was a piece of yarn with a bell tied to it. She explained that she had made an ornament to hang on my tree.

Each year, I sort through things and end up holding that little loop of yarn and the tiny bell...I think of all of the hikes in the woods we had together and smile. The memories are fond. 

I have fancy beautiful horse ornaments and shiny glittery ornaments, but this one always gets a special spot where I can walk by and ring it.

That little girl is preparing to go to college next year. She is no longer a little girl. She is tall, poised, and confident in what she wants to do in her life. And she even has time to text me once in a while about her interests.

Of all the beautiful things I have, this one means the most to me.

Nothing like a little bell to ring as I walk by it. Here was a young girl who thought enough to make me a small gift to hang on my tree.

Another ornament that actually doesn't get hung on a tree is the Morris Ornament. I commissioned an artist in 2009 to make me 3 ornaments of Mr. Morris. This guy comes out of the hutch each year and graces a special spot in the living room.

Thanks Shirley for this suggestion!

Saturday was a Creative Day

Rain, Rain, Rain. Mud. Heavy Rain. Saturday was not a day to be out and about. I'd gotten soaked doing the morning chores.

I resigned myself to getting things done around the house. I cleaned the floors and picked up things I'd just dropped in places. Supper was leftover Chili so I didn't have to work on that.

I finally decided to open up a file and work on my Tree Photobook. 

I popped on a pair of headphones and tuned Pandora into my favorite mix of music to drown out Swamp People, old Football Games, and other noises and 

got

into 

the 

Zone.

When I sat down to write, I had no idea what to do. I'd tried this several times and closed the laptop without inspiration. 

Perhaps the rain and dreary day would inspire me. 

For a bit I stared at the blank page in front of me.

B L A N K

I used the title from Mary Oliver's Poem: When I am Among Trees to jump start my ideas.

Interestingly enough, I did not include any artistic off the wall renderings of the photos I took of the trees. Most were black and white winter photos of the shapes and branches.

I only worked with photos from January through Spring. Most of the photographs I chose were ones I took in the winter months.

Then it hit me.

I was happy in the trees.

The trees fascinated me.

I like to be in the woods alone because no one sees me admire the trees and lean up against them as if they are my best friends. No one sees me put my arms around a sapling and reach up to touch their bark and admire their coat of moss.

Oh and...

Trees don't talk back to you...

While hiking I often stop dead in my tracks to look up and just

look.

I am always fascinated by the shapes made by the tree's growth.

In the summer these shapes are mostly hidden.

In the winter? They are laid bare.

I'd made a colorful and autumn like cover for the book and then decided that it would not work. Many photos of winter trees are stark and all about shape not necessarily color.

I had some color photos, but...

I think for consistency I will make all of the photos black and white? 

Well, perhaps. But there will be a couple that absolutely need to be in color.

I guess, in the end, it doesn't matter too much. I am just doing this for myself.

Sample photos:

The alternate cover?

Something like this:

or.....
this one.

It looks less foreboding and dark. Though I do like the starkness of black and white.

This is what I do for my Fall Fun. I used to write a story each fall when I had Mr. Morris in my life. I wrote for the Grand kids. They loved getting books of Morris's Toy Adventures. It was silly but fun.

It was time to do another Nature themed photo book.

Now to proof read it and edit.

I do use Blurb to do these projects as I've always had a great product from them. 

Now that I have just about finished this. I will complete my Trail Challenge and begin sorting for my next adventure story.

Thanks to Aurora for an incredible photo that I will use 

in..

Trails With Charlie/ A year's worth of Hiking with a tiny dog.

Photo Credit: Aurora Williamson

 

Clean and purge. Uh oh..

So Blogger.com is angry with me? I don't get it. I can't post a photo and I've done everything possible. Message: Sorry! An unexpected error occurred while processing your selection.  Please try again later.

👀👅💣💥 however I can post emoji's ... ahem...

So what to do on a COLD and rainy day???

🌦🌧⛆

Time to purge and clean things in the house again.

I have to clear out the tiny living room so the flooring guys can rank the carpeting and put in the nice pretty flooring. I like to think far ahead and get things ready instead of waiting for the last minute.

We have to move the hutch and this huge a$$ed Trunk that Rich had packed plum or is it Plumb?... full of aged memorabilia. His High School Purple sweater from when he was 16, it was one his mom was going to attach his sport 'letters' to. No way it would fit him now.

Then there were those horrid looking teddy bears that look like something Hollywood would use in a horror movie.😱 [ no photo so use your imagination! these bears should be photographed in a scary place...hmmmmmmm...my tiny brain just got an idea]

Every baseball he ever used in high school when he was pitching. I think they were game balls or something. I set the balls out on the table. 

Geeze, I nearly said I 'set' his balls on the table.

Anyway. He was able to tell me the significance of each baseball. Then we moved to a box of photos of his family from a gazillion years ago. His father's baby photo! 
So I went through each photo and ID'd the people on the back. These are folks I have never seen and who were great grandmas, uncles, aunts, and homes from long ago. It was fun for him to tell me who the people were. 
I may pass these to his daughter eventually. 
Not the [base] balls though.

I got permission to toss the purple sweater and some magazines from over 30 years ago. He wanted to keep them and I asked 'what for'. I kept the ones that featured my photos and articles but tossed the rest. 

Old videos. Old family video tapes that were poor quality back then and re-recorded so many times that they were blurry and snowy. I imagine age has not improved them.

I'd like to get rid of the trunk as it takes up floor space that we really could use much better. Alas. He is very attached to it. The table we sit at is likewise too large to fit in our eating area, but it was a hand me down from his Grandmother. So it stays. 

After cleaning the trunk, I moved my books and other pieces of stuff upstairs. Then I sat upstairs and went through my junk. I have 3 of those reusable cloth shopping bags full of items I am tossing. I have another box packed and ready to send of to the younger grand kids with some toys.

I have one more box of Carousel Horse music boxes. I think I will see if any of my CrossFit friends have little girls that would like them. 

The strangest item I could not let go of was a rock. It was a rock I picked up in 1996. There is a long story behind that piece of rock. It stays. I will return it one day from where I took it. 

Soulmates

The horse that started it all. Her name was Cheyanne and I purchased her for about $400 green broke. I was green broke too. She taught me so much about equine. She was super sensitive to human attitudes. 
Her awareness of her rider's mental state was hypersensitive.

She did a stint in 4 H with Horseless Horse riders and went to state with a rider. 

Unfortunately that atmosphere was not her forte. She did well but stressed out so badly especially when her rider came out of the arena and started to slap Chey because she didn't get first place. 
The rider blamed Cheyanne. Interestingly enough the rider's mother came up to me and complained that I should have made them do better and they would win next year.

I asked the rider to dismount and told mom that her daughter would never touch my horse again.

I ended up moving from the Kenosha area out to the western part of the state. 

I started riding mules and Cheyanne was bred to our Jack. Her first daughter, Sunshine has that floating trot that Chey had. Cheyanne was 1/2 Arab and 1/2 Quarter horse. We never were quite sure which breed would show up while riding her. If we had really tough trails, she would be calm. If it was boring, she would look for monsters. That was Chey.

Rich purchased a big tall lanky mule for me in Missouri out of our Jack. His name was Badger. If ever I had a soulmate in equine form, Badger was it.

I had to finish 'training' him and by doing that, I learned so much more about mules and their loyalties. We showed in Western Pleasure, played at Gymkhana, and explored wild woods nearly every day together.

The man who 'started' Badger under saddle said he was worthless and no good. He didn't have heart and sulled out all of the time. 

Badger was 15 hands and thought he was tiny. For the rest of his life he did not tolerate big male people. 

He even tried Endurance Riding with me. We never won anything, but we always passed vet checks with a great score card.

He adored little people.

We lost Badger in 2012 and I struggled to find another soul mate. 

Sunshine is Badger's half sister out of Cheyanne without the Cheyanne attitude. We also had Siera a Peruvian Paso mule with an amazing attitude. 

Sunshine is steady. She has had her moments, but has turned into one of the best wild wood mounts I've ever had. She is small enough to go morel hunting with, easy on and off, and confident in solo riding.

Siera is an amazing ride. On the flat she can gait out like nothing I've ever ridden. She is calm when she has company and a bit nervous solo. She rarely gets bothered if her rider doesn't understand what they are doing. She just stops what she is doing and waits.
Best thing of all, when she is frightened she just stands there. Siera is the ultimate in lazy.

At first I thought Siera would be my next pure mule soulmate. 

The more I interact with my mules, the more I have discovered that Sunshine, that little red mule that everyone laughed at...has become my little darling. 

Every day at chore time. She comes and stands before me and waits for me. She is kind and attentively listens to my daily troubles and offers only her friendship.

She never runs away from me when I have a halter.

She is like her half brother. True through and through. 

My beautiful redhead.

There I go ... Memory Lane. Mules, horses, life, and love.

I can't wait to go riding again!

I may have take Siera or Sunshine out when the weather warms up and do some snow play.

Have a great day.

More UnTree

What on earth are YOU talking about? NO one does Christmas without a Christmas tree right?

Well I'm sure there are folks who do!

I'm just looking for something different and fun.

I don't know exactly where to start, so I'll just start with what caught my eye as I was twiddling my thumbs.

Last year I took some time to wander around the Walmart clearance section. I saw a lot of Teddy Bears lined up on shelves. One had only one eye.

It wasn't something I was looking for. But I drove home with my list filled up and the thought of that Pink One Eyed Teddy Bear kept coming back to me.

I have no idea why.
I needed to pick something up the next day. Most of the Bears were gone. The one eyed bear was pushed to the side. I was so relieved for some reason and stuck it in my basket. At the check out one of the lady's pointed out that this Teddy was defective, did I really want it?
I smiled and said that I was positive I wanted just as it was.

Welcome Pink Teddy with one eye in one of my crates. She has gold ribbons, beads, and a very festive and vintage handkerchief around her neck. She looks happy. The kerchief is actually one of my Grandmother Pearl's fancy handkerchiefs.  I put this together and sat back. Grandma's 'kerchief' and the Teddy Bear no one wanted. Beautiful. I knew this Bear had some sort of purpose!

The next box has some of my 'toys' that I like to take on hikes. I know, but it is fun to find odd places to put Teddy Bears and other toys.

These were Thrift Shop toys. Toys from the back room that had fallen between other toy piles.
I had picked them up and held on to them for a long time. They appealed to me in a way so I brought them home.

Oh look. 3 little bears! And then there is Rabbit and Bear! I bet you are wondering how I got those two beany bears to stand. Hah. Not telling my secrets.

Another item under construction. These are... twig trees with little red light up ornaments. They are not super bright. I used floral foam blocks inside the old sewing drawer to stick them in and then a bag of glass marble like fillers to hold it all in place. The checker board is topping a crate. It was an old handpainted checkerboard piece that hung in my MIL's apartment.

Hopefully this isn't boring anyone.

Here is a look at the whole 'display'...which has already been changed up a bit since I took the photo yesterday.

Note the Gnome with the Skunk Hat! A wonderful young lady who is the DIL of my MIL's sister...okay yeah...that was an odd way of describing her....

...she makes these! She calls them Nisse.
Pretty neat right?

Stay tuned. More to come from the boxes and then I move on to some other fun items.
A story behind most every one with a beautiful memory.

Slippage

Brain Disease.
Doctors call it Alzheimers or Dementia.
It is a brain disease.

The brain is a functional organ that is the hard drive for our bodies.
When the brain misfires it begins to have Bad Sectors and cannot be rebooted or reset. Portions of memory files are misplaced or become corrupt and lost in in the recycle bin to be lost forever. The brain slips a bit like a vinyl record with a bad scratch. It is not fixable. Files keep slipping away and taking memories with them.
The brain eventually forgets how to tell the rest of the body how to function.  The 'hard drive' begins to have terrible issues as time moves on, more functions are lost.

Well at least this is how I have come to understand Dementia. I decided that since I have to live with that ugly word, I would make it less ugly and call it Brain Slippage.
I've had to explain my MIL's condition more than once to a relative. The best thing I could come up with has been the analogy to the computer's hard drive and system of files.

Once the computer's hard drive is so full of gaps and holes, the rest of the functions no longer work.

I just finished reading The Last Ocean, A Journey Through Memory and Forgetting by Nicci Gerrard.

If you have an aging partner or parent, it is a worthy read. We can never truly understand how memories and the brain function, but the author show us how compassion and caring are so important. How we should not let those with Slippage become unseen and forgotten people.

Are we truly made up of our memories? What happens when those memories are no longer? Are we then something or someone else? What defines us?

These are questions the author asks us.

When I visit with my MIL. I see slippage. What was reality a year ago or even just months ago is no longer. She has lost 10 years of memories which is fine because she is perfectly happy recalling her house on the ridge and not the apartment she moved into.
Will she recall her great grandchildren? Probably as they are something that may be more important in her file system.
She knows me and sometimes I am younger in her mind and sometimes I am in the present.

Does it matter to her? No, she is perfectly happy or so she thinks. She asked me to show her a photo of the building she used to live in. She said someone told her she used to live there. I brought it up on my phone and showed it to her.
She shook her head.

Nope. She couldn't picture it at all. Couldn't recall what the apartment looked like either.
But the house on the ridge, do you recall that?

Oh yes!
I asked if it bothered her at all not recalling the apartment. And she looked me straight in the eye and asked me:

Why would it?

Indeed.
Don't try to convince her that she HAS to remember. That is such a big mistake with those that have slippage. Don't force what they cannot recall.

Trying to make her recall things that have drifted away is only an irritant. It does nothing to make her day happier.
Bingo makes her happy.
Painting class makes her happy.
Meals make her happy.

Visits from loved ones make her whole world. It brightens the day by day routine of eat, sleep, nap, get wheeled somewhere, and look out a window or stare at a wall.

I don't mind it when she falls asleep while I am visiting. I sometimes hold her hand just to be with her. Sometimes I wait for a while and then give her a hug and leave.
She loves hugs.

One day her memory of me may slip into the recycle bin and be lost.

Young Me...

I heard about the 'aging' photo challenge on FB by accident the other day. Guess I'm not one of those that likes selfies.
Nor do I like to remind myself of how weathered my face has become. I say weathered because I think it is kinder than saying old and wrinkled.

Perhaps the weather does have a lot to do with my skin. I don't really protect it from the rough dry winter air while hiking. I do use sunscreen on my face but most of the time I forget.

I don't spend much time indoors. Even with the snow fall today, I was out picking up branches and sticks from the blow down we had two years ago. I tossed hundreds of chunks of wood, bark, and sticks onto a small brush fire that I have had going since 10 am this morning.
[It is now nearly 3:30 pm and I am done in!] I can't believe how many branches and dead old wood I picked up from the north side of the little shed.

I explained to Rich that I may as well go in there and clean it up while there were no weeds growing and while there were no bugs. Besides, it is much better to do something like that than sitting in the house watching the snow fall to the ground.

I tidied up in the large shed and gave Mica and extra helping of hay. I put the hay to put out for this evening in the large black carcass sled.

It looks like I may have to drive the skid steer again this weekend. We were only supposed to get a few inches. Well that changed to the change of a bunch. There is a prediction of up to 9 inches or maybe only 5.
The temperatures are going to plummet again which will make the ice formations do more interesting things along the creek bottom.

Oh wait...
I started out talking about the Aging Challenge photos. Huh.
Well here are a few young photos of me over the years.

My brother had many of my father's slides scanned and digitalized.

Here are a few of my younger self.

I believe this is the winter of 1965. I'm standing watching Kilauea in the distance. I'm actually at the Halemaumau vent. I'm sure that has changed.

Here we are as a family. Dad is taking the photo. We are on the Devastation Trail which was a boardwalk then. We drove the whole park on the Chain of Craters Road which was closed in 1969 because of a lava flow. However, it keeps getting rebuilt on top of the new lava flows....

There I am in the middle belly surfing on stryofoam boards at Hapuna Beach, this was before their was the Queen's Highway to Kona. And this was before the Mauna Kea Hotel was built just north of Hapuna.
There were no shelters or bathrooms then either.

Years later?

Hapuna Beach:

My mother is on the right and I am on the left. I think this is one of my favorite photos of all time. My mom and I look like sisters. Dad caught us in a moment where we aren't paying attention to each other but mom and I ... are both lost in our own thoughts...

There it is ... the young me.

Reading Far Side of Fifty's Blog has brought back fond memories just as my brother began posting photos.

Friends Forever

So today I was cleaning out Morris's toy box. No worries, he seems to be doing just fine. I picked up Hoppy the Hedgehog, Terrible Tiger, and Crazy Tiger. I tossed the old pull toys but sat on the floor staring at Morris's characters that had been the subject of so many fun stories.

Morris pretty much ignores his toys now. Sleep is a big thing. Sleep and walking to the bus stop are his priorities. Well. Food.
He doesn't play even if I toss the toys for him.
I couldn't bring myself to toss the characters out. However they do need a good wash and a few repairs.

And then I began to think. One more storybook? One more adventure?
What would it be about?

How could I work Morris's aging into it? How would the story evolve?

Friends Forever.
I held the smelly toys and stared at Morris who gazed sleepily back at me.
I felt a welling up of emotions from deep within.

I may have hit upon my next project.

Memories of back ... then.

I went to the garden to pick some Zinnias for my in house bouquets the other night. I stopped to look over my 4 o'clocks which were opening because it was evening.

I glanced down at the bright happy flowers of the 4 o'clocks and then noticed that they were beginning to produce seeds.

I knelt down next to them and began to search for the little black seeds that I told my sons were flower 'hand-grenades'.  Well, that is what they look like.

As I started to pick and search in between the flowers I was reminded of doing this with my boys while waiting for their school bus to arrive to pick them up in the morning.
And how I sat near the flowers and waited for them to depart from the bus on the corner down the street.
The memories of them being so young washed over me.

It really hadn't felt as if it were so long ago. Yet it was.
I held in my hands the seeds of memories.

I don't think I can ever gather 4 o'clock seeds without thinking of my sons, the first days of school, and school buses.

Indeed it was a very pleasant memory.