Thoughtful

 

Mindful.

Thoughtful.

Winter nights seem to give me more time to pay attention to things I wouldn't normally think of.

Mindfulness means a lot of different things. To me, I just felt that it meant to be more aware of others and their feelings.  Grandma always reminded us to be Mindful of our manners so I was a bit surprised to see that Mindfulness is meditation so that you can feel in the moment.

I looked up Thoughtful, it says to be more aware of others feelings.

Color me confused or old fashioned. I decided to chalk it up to Semantics. My definitions of thoughtful and mindful are similar. Apparently it isn't any more.

December's dreary days lead me to do more thinking. Yeah. I shouldn't be doing that. I mean thinking usually gets me in trouble. I think up scenarios all night with the preface of: What If?
In the summer I'm too tired to think of What If's since I'm physically busy all day.

I recently read Annie Dilliard's Novel The Maytrees. First off, this is a hard book to follow. Her writing jumps all over the place as if she were super high on caffeine when she wrote it. 

Sort of like me on some days when I jump around in conversation or home duties. 

The book is about a couple ... the novel explores their love, loyalty, friendship, and forgiveness. It explores the human heart. 
Usually books don't move me much. I read a lot of novels and don't even know why I decided to pick this one up. I was looking for Pilgrim at Tinker Creek and found this book at the library.

When I finished the book I sat for a very long time just being thoughtful while looking at the lights and decorations in the room.

What better time of the day than a dark cold night to sit and think about everything in life. I asked myself questions in my head.
How did I get here?
Where will I go from here?
Has my life been meaningful?
Does it really matter?

Will I make a difference?

What will it be like when I am just a memory?

Night Skiing

Text: Meet me at the mailbox at 8:30?

Me: Yes! Skis?

Text: Yes skis please!

Me: Okay!

I hustled around the house, made supper and then gathered my gear together. GG gave me that funny look, as though I had two heads.

"Are you going on the ridge and skiing in that ice and blowing snow? You guys nuts?"

Me: "Ahhh yup."

At the top of the ridge is 65 acres of cropland with gentle dips and dipsy doodles of strip crop planting. We've had snow, then rain, then melt, then snow, then sleet-rain, and then freezing and tonight it was snowing and blowing hard.

As I walked up from our house I could hear the wind in the trees. It sounded like an ocean above me! 

I met up with Lauren and we headed right into the brunt of the wind and snow. We laughed behind our scarves. 

We wobbled across ice crust patches and soft gushy snow drifts and several times we both had great 'runs' of pushing and gliding. 

I went down a hill and hit a soft spot. Poof. Nearly a face plant. Lauren started laughing and lost her footing and we both lay in the snow just laughing at ourselves. 

Our skis made horrid sounds as they went over glare ice and the poles came in very handy. Balance on ice was a bit interesting especially when one ski would go straight and the other one sideways.
Corn stalks were just another added obstacle, especially while going down a grade.
Take my word for it the tall alfalfa was easier to get through than some of the stalks.

By our second round we were flying in the good places and pacing ourselves.

If we ever get on a groomed trail we might even be awesome. We both would like to ...ski or snowshoe at least two times a week [at night of course]. 

There is something wildly free and liberating about skiing at night on ice/snow in a snow squall.

I can sleep well tonight.