Vanessa

From pre 1960 to 1964 we lived just outside Chicago in a town called Evanston. We rented the lower floor of a huge house. 

I started school at Oakton Elementary School and recall walking to school. It wasn't far I guess from where we rented lived. 

Apparently I liked Kindergarten. I know I went to school there until 3rd grade when we moved to Northbrook.

It was in that Evanston house that I met Vanessa. She was hired by the upstairs landlord to be a housekeeper I think. I'm not exactly sure. All I know, is that she was there weekly in our house. 

She was black and I went to school with black kids. Though, at the time, none of that really mattered much to a kid my age.

Vanessa was like having a cool Auntie around the house. She always took time with us. She would be there and then not there. 

My school was black and white also, but I'm not even sure that I noticed. 

My young life was all about school, staying out of trouble with mom, and playing.

The crabby man next door liked to yell at us if we played to close to his house or if we stepped on his lawn.

There was the lonely lady right across the street. We would go visit her and have juice and treats. Once a huge storm toppled a tree in her back yard and she let us come over and climb all over it until the tree trimmers came to clean it up.

She had neat juice glasses with bunnies on it. 

I know my life at the time was busy and confusing. I had to have eye surgery. I was constantly causing a ruckus at school. I was a little rebel of sorts.

At one point in time my mom disappeared for a while. We were told she was sick and in the hospital. 

All I know is that Vanessa stepped in and took care of us.

I think she came during the day and got us off to school. She prepared breakfasts for us and was there to feed us supper. I don't really recall much about it. Just that she was there and full of love while the other adults were busy.

I do recall her making Fried Bologna Sandwiches for lunch one day. It was the most divine sandwich ever! It smoked up the house.

Her oatmeal sucked. But then we had to instruct her how mom would make it. We found it completely odd that Vanessa didn't know how to make oatmeal. I recall we told her she had to put some salt in the water. We ended up with some vile tasting oatmeal. It didn't matter. We laughed about it and off to school we went with lunches packed by Vanessa.

Vanessa was free with hugs and had an endless patience for 3 kids. 

One day my parents announced that we were moving. The new place we were renting was out in the country. Mom and Dad had taken us to several places they'd looked at. I was hoping they had picked a place where we could have a pony.

It was in a small town called Northbrook. Indeed the street we would live on had a farm house across the street and fields behind it.

Vanessa came to help us clean and move our items.

Vanessa worked all day scrubbing and cleaning as we moved in. I was so happy to have her around. I would take any opportunity possible to take her hand and receive a loving embrace. She had gazillions of warm hugs.

Done.

We had moved in.

At the end of the day we had to take Vanessa back home. We piled into our car and took a long drive to somewhere deep in Chicago. We pulled up in front of a rather dull looking bunch of buildings and Vanessa gathered her things. 

I'd been sitting in the back seat with her and played with her shiny pin that she always wore. 

As my parents talked with Vanessa, I realized that she wouldn't be seeing us any more. 

This was the end. I was horrified and threw a fit. I cried and clung to her. Vanessa consoled me. Why couldn't she still be in our lives?

Why couldn't she just live with us?

Vanessa shocked me then. She quietly explained that she did have a family and children of her own that lived in the housing complex we were at.  

I was stunned. How could she have a family. We were her family. 

Vanessa untangled herself from me and pulled her shiny pin off from her jacket.

"Here, to remember me by." 

Tears blurred my eyes as I watched her walk away and out of my life.

I clutched the pin.

I implored my parents to let Vanessa and her family to come live with us.

It wasn't possible they said.

And Vanessa couldn't take the bus to our house anymore because we had moved so far away.

I was crushed.

I asked my parents if I could go live with Vanessa.

A resounding ... No.

I have never forgotten Vanessa. I may have forgotten the names of children I played with, I may have forgotten so many things.

But I have never forgotten Vanessa.

And when I see a pin like the one above, I can't help but to think about that night when Vanessa pulled the pin off her jacket and handed it to me in the back seat of my parents' car.

As I child I never understood why Vanessa had to live with her family in public housing and we could live in a nice house nearly out in the country. Oh for the innocence of being a young child.

Vanessa made such an impression on my life that I don't think I could ever forget her.