Looking to find normal

 or something that might be normal. I imagine people who have lost a loved one go through this also. I found myself this morning just standing in the kitchen area wondering what to do next.

I felt as if I was stuck there. Stuck to the floor with the kitchen sink staring at me. I blinked. I sighed. I wondered, did a few moments go by while I was in 'Stuck Land'?

I shook it off and decided another morning walk would be the right thing to do. I needed to go check the pasture fences even though no mules where in the meadow.

This is one of our morning views. Fog branches trees, a large wild meadow....

I didn't have my zoom lens I use for wildlife with me, but this guy showed up in our meadow. I did crop this hard. The buck is a 10 pointer. I will only admire him with photos. Though I wouldn't mind some venison myself this winter.

Sunrise in the fall is magical. The heavy fog and dew create a magical place for photographers.

My 'friends' the orb spiders are still building nightly webs in the east meadow. I am enjoying walking among them and feel slightly honored to be able to photograph them up close and personal.

I had a lunch date with my MIL's cousin who may be in her late 80's but is no frail flower. She is a force to be reconned with. We often try to meet up at least once a month through the spring to fall months and have lunch together. She is stubborn and strong like ... well myself. She has opinions and insights and is just an amazing woman who is struggling with her husband's Alzheimer's. 

She is an independent cuss just like me. She doesn't speak Bull-it, she speaks her opinions, for that I love her. 

We missed 6 months of lunches but made our date today. She is an elder that I have the utmost respect for. She has lived most of her life with her husband who lived on the road and has an independence streak that would put most elderly ladies to shame.

I see her and I feel comforted. We are comforting souls.

This afternoon I had a Pet Trailer for my bike delivered. I like bike riding and there are several choices of nice flat riding trails within 45 to 60 minutes from my house.

I figured it was NOT fair to Charlie to leave him home alone all day while I went exploring. So I did this....

He isn't too sure about the whole thing, but he likes the treats he finds inside the trailer. 

Charlie is now my soul-sole companion. We can adventure together. We can watch out for each other.

I think I will find out how good my leg muscles are soon after not having much exercise for the past 6 months.

My ex daughter in law sent me a card today and I took her letter and card to heart.

The pain of a loss
Reflects
How deeply our Hearts
Have Loved.